Rainy days with The Shins & Alexandre Desplat

This past Tuesday night it rained. 

Rained hard for the first time in quite a while. We’ve had some very sparse little showers off and on around us but it’s been rare that they’ve come right over top of us; and rarer still that it’s a storm. 

I personally love a good rain storm. I especially love the summertime ones without thunder and lightening that one can walk in. This storm was full of high wind, heavy downpours and some lightening, so indoors won. 

Aptly enough, it was a typical Tuesday so responsibilities trumped evening strolls. That and it’s no secret that I’m not taking a stroll anytime soon (Looking at you caretakers). I can however enjoy a good soundtrack in addition to the rain while decompressing from the day and cooking dinner. The playlist for this specific night is fairly short since dinner was not complex and consisted of The Shins “New Slang”and some Alexandre Desplat “The Grand Budapest Hotel soundtrack” with a side of Til Brönner’s “Ach, blieb mit denier Grande” (Oh, Stay with your grace). 

Sometimes you just need a selection of lesser known music to set the tone.

Blog Resurrection

I’ve had a significant quantity of people over the past few months question where my writings disappeared to and why I stopped posting them and share how much they were missed. Initially I was skeptical—not of the genuineness in the comments, but in whether or not the writings really mattered. If anyone really and truly did care to find some sort of meaning, comfort, frustration, understanding, curiosity, etc. in my wandering thoughts. After enough people, many of whom are not connected to one another in any way other than each knowing me in some way, mentioned missing these musings it got me thinking. Just not quite thinking enough to put it into practice, or maybe just enough to stop me. 

Either way, I realize it’s been nearly three years since I shared my ramblings. So much life has happened in this gap to all of us, some good and some not so good. The interesting thing though is that the theme that’s been rolling around in my mind for the past few months seems to pick up right where I left off, but with a slightly different twist. Go ahead all you human psychological behavior nerds and think to yourselves that this could likely mean that I’ve been emotionally or mentally stationary these last three years if I’m still stuck on the same theme. I certainly thought it about myself, then I realized that I have in fact weathered a great deal in this timeframe and that funnily enough the same concern of my heart and mind exists in spite of all the global trauma we’ve all endured; except now there are more than just my voice singing this song. 

While my offers to keep the USPS employed and to get to know people are still on the table, they come with an understanding, disclosure or if calling it a rule suits you better then so be it, though I hesitate to go there. It is simply this: Please keep right on passing by if you’re only going to make time for a shallow friendship. Hear my heart please, I’m not saying I don’t have time or a need for you in my life—you have a place and chances are you’re already rocking it. However please know there is a loss of intimacy in the fringe, a missing out if you will on ever really knowing anything about one another. This is more for the ones who are living on that edge and are wrestling with taking the leap into something deeper or remaining on the fringe. For those of you who want to remain on the fringe and only ever read these thoughts in passing, I say you go on and rock that fringe, again, there is a place for you here. 

For the ones of you willing to risk it and make the leap, know that this is a judgement free place—though I must go ahead and tell you that judgement free does not mean stagnant. If, on this journey there are things that either of us notices that can be better or is a blind spot, have the courage to say so from a place of love. You may get told to shut up for a moment but if you’re trying to help build a better person and relationship then just as quickly you’ll be told what was pointed out is something that needs further consideration. Likely your thoughts and opinions will be sought after. 

All we have to remember is we’re all just trying to find our niche and the people crazy enough to hang out with us when we do. So, for all of you who intentionally or unintentionally made a comment about missing these shenanigans, thank you, and happy reading and commenting. 

Let's do life, together.

Let me warn you at the beginning, this will be long. If you've only got two minutes, table it and come back when you can read it all the way through. 

I recently read a post someone shared about things from their childhood and it got me thinking.

I remember as a kid the constants in life and how badly I miss them. Everything from regular life events, school, family gatherings, meals, church activities and vacations. Even all the times hearing if I would bother to apply myself just a bit farther or harder I could be top of the game. All of these things shaped who I am today. I wouldn't trade anything for the memories and lessons. The people that were the constants in this life I lived made it what it is. They were there through all the fun times and the summer travels, multiple housing moves, birthdays and holidays. But they were also there during the hard times; the sicknesses, the relationship struggles, kid issues, health concerns and deaths. These people hung in and didn't disappear into their own universes when things got hard. They taught me how to love and be loved. That being said, what I would trade is nearly anything to have some of that in life now. What I want and need is people who are willing to take the risk and do life alongside me and mine.

Before those of you that have been, at various points, right here walking this life road with me get all wound up, sit down. Be patient and hear me out. I have loved you at various points on this path and still do. Circumstances and major life events have put a geographical distance between many of us. For the few that are still somewhat close by, crazy schedules means we rarely get face time. For each and every one of you whether close by or far away, know that I love you all deeply and am so thankful for technology that allows us to easily keep in contact (Though I won't lie, I'm still on the hunt for a pen pal if any of you is interested in keeping the USPS employed with me). I want to take the moment to tell each of you how grateful I am for all of the life we've been through. You guys have listened to me tell stories, cry, scream, and heaven knows vent. You've let me in on your secrets and see all your ugly parts, and you've stuck around during mine. I've gotten to hold your babies, play with your kids, mentor your middle and high schoolers and listen to your stories about them and theirs about you. We're never going to lose our bonds even when we don't get to spend quality face time together. If anything here you hear, know I thank you and love you for this. These words that follow are not so much for you, but feel free to read on.

This is more a lifeline for people who are nearby and willing to take a risk and be vulnerable. What I'm curious to find is if there are still new people around me who are willing to peel back the onion layers and do this thing called life alongside me and mine. Are you willing to share your dreams, your highs, lows, and stale times? Are you willing to share the heartaches and hurts; the secrets? Are there still chairs around your table to meet new people? Or maybe to just say to someone like me, "I've seen you around but never gotten to really know you." Or is your life too crowded and busy? Maybe you have enough close by friends still that this doesn't really resonate to you. My hope for you is that you treasure them and that reality if you still have it.

I'd be willing to bet though that there's more than just me out there feeling this way. If so, please know that I'd love to get to know you and yours and hear your story. I’d love to hold your babies if you want a break or be a mentor to your middle or high schooler. I'd love to get together once a week, month whatever and have dinner in one of our homes just because. Friendships don't have to be surrounded by an event or outing; let's get back to the simple things. Let's get to the real life stuff. Come on over for a movie night or spend a Saturday running errands together or watching football. I'm willing to get in the mud with you so we're all better and stronger on the other side. I'll even hand you a towel. 🙂
Any takers?