Reality in this moment...

Recently I found myself home alone and became completely enamored with a history documentary. I mean it was full on nerding out and I am not even a little ashamed, in fact quite the contrary. I loved it! It felt so wonderful to sit and learn about the history of people I had never learned much about, ask me sometime and I'll gladly tell you about it.
This particular evening was a postlude to some very trying days. In particular was the day that I realized that this

 has been 20 years true.
Not every day was a complete wash; I did have one in there where I willingly pushed myself through exhaustion to support one of the families headed to Africa next month from our church, and as a bonus got to see a friend unexpectedly, met some new peeps, and got sweet kisses from another dear friends' pup who was "on tour" with the new peeps while her owners were out of town. That was a delightful respite from the reality in this moment of life.
Too often of late my mind and body have seemed to be in an ever existing battle with my soul, and with themselves.  The struggle is very real and to admit that it's time for something to change is perhaps the most difficult part. I've been at war with myself and not wanted to admit its truth, but knowing all the while that I had to. Weeks recently have been ones of confusion it seems. I told some of the people closest to me where I am, have been, and know I need to head. They love me anyway and somehow through it all still see the good in me, it is inspiring.
During this season there have been days that were so dark I wasn't sure if I'd survive them and yet God always put at least one person in my path to shed light. I am forever grateful to their obedience even when they were unaware of it, maybe especially so. I'm reminded that there are always constants in life and that God is the epicenter of all of them. In spite of everything in these shadows my faith never waivered and if I'm truly transparent, has grown stronger as I feel myself being pulled into the chasm that is God's love and strength. I am reminded that God is my shield and defender and that means from everything, even my own thoughts if need be. So while this season is existing and will be a daily struggle to move beyond, I know I will succeed because God will go ahead of me and be right beside me the whole time. St. Patrick had it right so many years ago, "above and below me, before and behind me, in every eye that sees me Christ be all around me." How fitting for us to remember it still.

Faith and Comfort Zones

The question was posed about if we believe that walking by faith requires us to step out of our comfort zone. While I can see exactly why and how people are 100% believing this is true, I can't help but think that if we are truly seeking to live and walk according to God's will that our comfort zone will be where God tells us to go and what God tells us to do. Is it so far-fetched to believe that we could come to a place where we are so accustomed to knowing that everything that God directs is going to accomplish what He has intended for it, in spite of our decisions that may "mess" it up? 

Society absolutely believes that it's ludicrous to think so, but what do we say as the "church"? If we really stop and evaluate our belief do we think it's lunacy or do we realize that it's completely normal? If we are striving to live for God the best way we know how wouldn't it be second nature (inadvertent), just like breathing in and breathing out, for us to never really question when things occur in our lives and we realize (whether in the moment or after) that we moved in faith? 

What opportunities do we have to grow in our relationship with God before it becomes second nature and our comfort zone is simply following God? 

Winds of change

Too long I've left this blog unattended. I feel it in my spirit and know it in my mind. I have not completely neglected my journaling though it did take a sabbatical of sorts.

So what can I tell you? Well the theme over the last year has been change. With change comes flexibility for certain but it's a delicate balance to bend and not break. The lives of the Big Dawg and I changed radically when we determined to sell our house. It's true that any type of selling and buying a home is challenging at the least. Oh, don't get me wrong, I love spending time looking at houses. There's something deep in me that sometimes looks to steal decorating ideas or organizational tips.
Be honest, you know you've done it.
So we put the house out there with a fantastic team of realtors and were given a list of items we needed to have done before it could actually go on the market. There's enough that happened getting that done to write many posts. So we began all that and had someone who was interested and put an offer before we were finished with our list. We hot-footed it then to find somewhere to live. We found the perfect place and made an offer that was accepted. We now worked to complete our list and begin the process of packing and purging; all the while thinking we are good to close on both houses on time.
Remember I said we must be flexible during change? We had a lesson that honestly I think we could have done without. Twenty days out from closing the man who had an offer on our house changed jobs, thus rendering him unqualified for a mortgage. When it was all said and done, we technically sold our house three times in thirty days. The second backed out when she, as a single lady decided she's not really ready for home ownership. The third one stuck and we were thrilled. In the end, God had all the timing worked out just as He always does.
The winds of change haven't completely left us just yet, I can feel it, but I dare say for the moment some of the biggest changes are behind us until a new adventure pops up. As has been said, Life is not about the destination but the journey. Too often I think we get too focused on our destinations and forget to enjoy the journey we're on. Take a moment and evaluate your landscape, when was the last time you enjoyed the journey?