Heart Hurts (If you're easily offended stop here)

September 10, 2025

 Today I watched a man be assassinated.

Disagreeing with someone else's view and opinions should not be a deciding factor for if they are permitted to live. Nor should it determine if you are permitted to live.

Before I get too deep in, let me be clear that this is not being said to open any doors to conversations about weapons and weapon control. This goes so much deeper than anyone's ability or right to possess any kind of weapon.

My heart is grieved at the events that unfolded today. There is a young wife and mother who is facing unimaginable grief as she has to navigate losing her husband. There are two very young children who will only ever know the man their father was through stories retold by others and videos they will watch. There are dozens of other friends and family members who will forever have a piece of their lives missing; and hundreds of families who will need professional help to process what they bore witness to and experienced first hand. Likewise, there is at least one family who now has to try and wrestle with why their loved one chose violence.

This man, 31 years old who made it one of his life's missions to engage in a healthy dialogue with anyone whether they believed differently than he or not, ripped away from this world while he sat defenselessly and was actively engaged in civil dialogue.

I wish that such a heinous atrocity was a scarcity. A genuine shock. A once in a lifetime type of historical event. Unfortunately it is a nearly daily occurrence throughout our world. Gone is the naivete that the world is open to persons sharing differing opinions and still being able to live as civilized beings it seems.

Perhaps I am still just naive enough to believe that across this world the vast majority of people still are open to understanding they don't know or understand it all. People who are still willing to listen to the views and opinions of persons who may line up along a different side of an aisle. Wouldn't it be grand to have the ability to snap my fingers and have this kind of world exist instead of the one where any little thing can quickly be twisted into something divisive.

I am equally as grateful for the people in my life who agree with me as I am the one who do not. Both types provide opportunities for growth, learning and stretching.

May we all strive to learn that violence is not the solution and that we each have a responsibility to carry ourselves in a manner that brings peace instead of conflict, respect instead of contempt, and light instead of darkness.

My hope and prayer is that somehow this unfortunate event can become a catalyst for change harkening us back to civil discourse. God grant us wisdom no matter where our beliefs lie.

More than ever before: Kyrie Eleison

*Added for the social media crowd:

If you find yourself celebrating someone being publicly assassinated simply because you think he deserved it, or because he didn't line up with your beliefs and views, then you are part of the problem with this world. We can agree to disagree and still live in relative harmony contrary to what the rhetoric is trying to force us all to believe. How about we let love really win?

Rainy days with The Shins & Alexandre Desplat

This past Tuesday night it rained. 

Rained hard for the first time in quite a while. We’ve had some very sparse little showers off and on around us but it’s been rare that they’ve come right over top of us; and rarer still that it’s a storm. 

I personally love a good rain storm. I especially love the summertime ones without thunder and lightening that one can walk in. This storm was full of high wind, heavy downpours and some lightening, so indoors won. 

Aptly enough, it was a typical Tuesday so responsibilities trumped evening strolls. That and it’s no secret that I’m not taking a stroll anytime soon (Looking at you caretakers). I can however enjoy a good soundtrack in addition to the rain while decompressing from the day and cooking dinner. The playlist for this specific night is fairly short since dinner was not complex and consisted of The Shins “New Slang”and some Alexandre Desplat “The Grand Budapest Hotel soundtrack” with a side of Til Brönner’s “Ach, blieb mit denier Grande” (Oh, Stay with your grace). 

Sometimes you just need a selection of lesser known music to set the tone.

Blog Resurrection

I’ve had a significant quantity of people over the past few months question where my writings disappeared to and why I stopped posting them and share how much they were missed. Initially I was skeptical—not of the genuineness in the comments, but in whether or not the writings really mattered. If anyone really and truly did care to find some sort of meaning, comfort, frustration, understanding, curiosity, etc. in my wandering thoughts. After enough people, many of whom are not connected to one another in any way other than each knowing me in some way, mentioned missing these musings it got me thinking. Just not quite thinking enough to put it into practice, or maybe just enough to stop me. 

Either way, I realize it’s been nearly three years since I shared my ramblings. So much life has happened in this gap to all of us, some good and some not so good. The interesting thing though is that the theme that’s been rolling around in my mind for the past few months seems to pick up right where I left off, but with a slightly different twist. Go ahead all you human psychological behavior nerds and think to yourselves that this could likely mean that I’ve been emotionally or mentally stationary these last three years if I’m still stuck on the same theme. I certainly thought it about myself, then I realized that I have in fact weathered a great deal in this timeframe and that funnily enough the same concern of my heart and mind exists in spite of all the global trauma we’ve all endured; except now there are more than just my voice singing this song. 

While my offers to keep the USPS employed and to get to know people are still on the table, they come with an understanding, disclosure or if calling it a rule suits you better then so be it, though I hesitate to go there. It is simply this: Please keep right on passing by if you’re only going to make time for a shallow friendship. Hear my heart please, I’m not saying I don’t have time or a need for you in my life—you have a place and chances are you’re already rocking it. However please know there is a loss of intimacy in the fringe, a missing out if you will on ever really knowing anything about one another. This is more for the ones who are living on that edge and are wrestling with taking the leap into something deeper or remaining on the fringe. For those of you who want to remain on the fringe and only ever read these thoughts in passing, I say you go on and rock that fringe, again, there is a place for you here. 

For the ones of you willing to risk it and make the leap, know that this is a judgement free place—though I must go ahead and tell you that judgement free does not mean stagnant. If, on this journey there are things that either of us notices that can be better or is a blind spot, have the courage to say so from a place of love. You may get told to shut up for a moment but if you’re trying to help build a better person and relationship then just as quickly you’ll be told what was pointed out is something that needs further consideration. Likely your thoughts and opinions will be sought after. 

All we have to remember is we’re all just trying to find our niche and the people crazy enough to hang out with us when we do. So, for all of you who intentionally or unintentionally made a comment about missing these shenanigans, thank you, and happy reading and commenting.